Today, during my beta program in the training room, I just realized, how I enjoyed study, listened to lecture, did tutorial (although I was lazy back then, and still now). I wanted to go back to the past, back to I used to be. Last time I didn't use the time wisely. I let that precious moment pass without harder effort. Now, I missed the moment. Reading textbook, highlithing the lecture notes, discussing with friend although it was stressing. I just think again, perhaps I want to give it a try SMA next year? Or just be here, working. Learning other thing in life, interact with people.
I just wondered, how difficult it is to adapt here. People are nice from the outside, only few come from the heart. People complaints all the time about anything, boss, colleagues. Then people from other departement who always argue and blame us, never introspection with themselves, just blame others. High responsibility on everything, so that you have to present if you do something wrong/ any fault found during your process in front of HOD (head of dept) who care only about profit, so they scold you and questioned your capability if this happens. Life is tough down here. But I know, my father surely has experienced this until he can stand where he is now, so I have to pass the situation bravely, with full of learning instinct from people who are smart on doing things but on the right way.
Just like my mentor said, "You have to learn the good thing from other people, not the bad thing." And it also prevailed for me, when I learn from her. If you ask me whether I like my mentor? I would say, "Nah...." She doesn't teach me much. I must be proactive and iniate to ask questions, which I am not use to it, since I am scare of her. She is fierce. So I have good thing and bad thing. Good, that I will learn to be independent, Bad that she doesn't take her responsibility well enough. Misunderstanding always happens with me. She always expect me to know a lot of things, but she never taught me, so how can I do it. Perhaps she expect me to learn by myself? Dunno....thinking about this make me stress.
Just talk about company promotion on movie ticket and M1 make me happier and excited. Hahaha....we have to think positive.
Be positive today, and give thanks to the Lord.
Few nights, I have dreamt specific dream, about some stories,which make me not to sleep well. Is it due to my work? or my relationship? I can't differentiate both. All twist on my mind. Why do I have to think about this things? Get out of my mind you two. Let me get a fresh mind and be happy all the time.
Singapore idol is coming, I always watch TV nowadays, since got nothing to do when I go back. Samsoon has ended. And the other korea series, Save the Last Dance for Me, going to end soon. I have watched the end series through youtube. Hahaha...I can't tahan to see the ending. Not too good. I should watch the beginning, I think it was nicer. Lovely house, cute couple, it is always like that. In the end all cry, suffered, sickness......etc.
Hope that I have a good life a head. Counting my salary, I have one today, yupppieee.....
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